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Raising NoS kids?

 
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eschano



Joined: 18 Jul 2012
Posts: 2611

PostPosted: Thu Jul 19, 2018 10:21 pm    Post subject: Raising NoS kids? Reply with quote

So I am really struggling with implementing an eating routine for my toddler. We are in the fortunate position to have one or two play dates a day (with the mums) and my child loves her peers. However, I am really struggling to implement any kind of eating routine for her because all her peers seem to be permasnacking. I very much struggle with this culture and where I am from (Austria) the kids don’t permasnack or at least none I know.
I am thinking first I need to get this so I can be a shining example for them but on top of that my kids are too young to get it just from that.
Has anyone had this problem and found any solutions?
Do you enforce no snacking when other kids eat snacks and drink juice (bane of my life as I don’t drink juice and don’t want my toddler to grow up on it) in front of yours?
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ladybird30



Joined: 07 May 2017
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PostPosted: Thu Jul 19, 2018 10:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This is a difficult one, and I didn't have children myself. But every family has its own rules that may not be the same as the rules for the neighbours families. As long as the rules are consistent, and calmly and lovingly explained, I believe
that most children will accept them, at least while they are young.
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Soprano



Joined: 08 Mar 2018
Posts: 387
Location: UK

PostPosted: Fri Jul 20, 2018 3:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Difficult one:

Give them tap juice Smile

Perhaps one snack a day if they are with other kids?

I think children might need to eat more regularly than adults as they are constantly on the go and growing.

More important to develop the habit as they get older so they carry it into adulthood

I wouldn't stress too much about it


Last edited by Soprano on Sat Jul 28, 2018 1:02 pm; edited 1 time in total
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eschano



Joined: 18 Jul 2012
Posts: 2611

PostPosted: Fri Jul 20, 2018 6:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thank you ladybird and J.
Yes, I might start 5 meals a day for my toddler and stick to it but it is tough. Toddler food is one of the worst foods out there. I try to just order off the adult menu for her but wherever we go there is the absolute worst snack food available. And they pretend it is healthy because it was made with concentrated grape juice instead of sugar.
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oolala53



Joined: 06 Oct 2008
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 22, 2018 4:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Apparently in Austria and France and possibly other countries not necessarily poor, children grow well without much snacking; I suspect it’s total calories that supports growth, not timing.

I’m not sure how you can get around this with a toddler. How much reasoning are they ready for? I guess you do your best to guide him to some kind of play, the real reason for being together. I shouldn’t even be weighing in on this, since I have no offspring. But I think parents must be doing gentle guiding on many fronts a lot of the time. No one expects kids to get it right off the bat. One example of guidance I would think might work when repeated is to talk about the good food the child can look forward to at the next meal, even as you might build up Daddy coming home or visiting Grandma. It would probably also be helpful before the play date to emphasize the fun things there will be to DO or SEE, etc.: to “fill up “ on non-food experiences.



Might you even have to make excuses to other parents? That’s easier, I think. I believe the “spoiling the appetite” card is often a good one. “Oh, my child eats his meals so much better when he hasn’t been nibbling or sipping juice along the way. It really spoils his appetite.”

Draw internal strength from knowing that many immigrants often gain weight when they move to America and give up their previous eating routine. I say you have a right to do your best to guide your kids in habits you know aren’t some terrible imposition of harshness.

And seeing Mommy wait for lunch/dinner and then enjoy her food can all be part of the coaching/guiding role. Or am I totally naive?
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eschano



Joined: 18 Jul 2012
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 22, 2018 9:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oolala, thank you so much, you are completely right. I will try my best. As my older one is not yet 2 it might be unworkable to have no snacks when other little ones are stuffing their face but by gently guiding her she might still eat less and then within the year I might succeed in establishing a routine. I was thinking along the lines of the French who add a fourth meal for kids at 15.30/16.00 as a planned snack. I will experiment this week.
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automatedeating



Joined: 31 Aug 2013
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 23, 2018 5:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Good luck with this!

Did I read that right -- 2 playdates every day? Wow, social butterflies! Smile

If there ARE two playdates every day, that sounds like two snacks a day, yes? Not horrible, I suppose, and like you said, you can wean down as she gets older.

Honestly, telling your munchkin that she can't have her snack until such-and-such a time (assuming you implement a snack), is really just part and parcel of disciplining a kid. We can't be afraid of their tantrums, and letting food be something we give in to (as opposed to a non-food limit) doesn't sound very NoSey of us, now does it?

The main place she'll learn great habits is by your meals made and eaten at home. She'll get used to 3 meals a day no problem that way as she grows, even if there are a few anomalies a week at this point in her life. Lucky girl!

As far as the juice, stand your ground! As a mamma with 2 kids (12 and 9 now, can you believe that?!), I promise you will NEVER regret it if you make a rule that your kiddos can either have milk or water, and just tell them and anyone that asks/pressures you. It's a simple rule. End of story, no need to defend yourself. Obviously special occasions cause the bringing out of other beverages, but for the most part you can keep it simple that way. That is one small victory I have had with my kids' diet. In many ways, I've been a big fail, but if even I could keep the juice away, then yay! It should be easy for you. Laughing

Wonderful to see you back!
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eschano



Joined: 18 Jul 2012
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2018 6:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thank you automated eating! I will take the juice rule to heart!
Yes we met her best friend again at softplay and as usual there wasn’t a moment where he didn’t have an unhealthy snack in his hands and mouth. I contained it to a banana and three chickpea crisps but with lots and lots of crying and whining. He is quite a big toddler already and I am finding it tough. His mum is by no means the only UK mum I know who deals with toddlers by permasnacking but I will do my best
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Soprano



Joined: 08 Mar 2018
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2018 6:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I brought my son up on water and milk and his teeth really benefitted. Stick to your guns your kids will thank you when they are older. They will also soon learn you mean it and stop whining Smile
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jenji



Joined: 26 Sep 2017
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 28, 2018 11:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think that children can learn that there is one rule for "in our house" and another for company or special occasions. We don't buy juice as a rule, and if I do, I buy a small container (e.g., a single or double serving container, which is several servings for us). When my child was small, the only time we had juice was with company. Today she is a teen who drinks water, tea, and milk by choice. She does love lemonade but knows it's an occasional treat.

I think the hard thing is that you don't want your child's friend to associate your house with being hungry. ??? I didn't discover No S until this year, so I admit I always served a snack when friends came over. I also gave my kid snacks on demand, often fruits or veggies cut up.
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oolala53



Joined: 06 Oct 2008
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 29, 2018 3:47 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just remembered eating coach Ellyn Sater, specializing in training children to be "competent eaters," saying parents determine when and what to offer children to eat: children choose how much.
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Mar/13-24.9 Stayed at +/- 8-lb. for three years Sept/17 22.8 (but more fluctuation)
Mar/18 22.2

There is no S better than Vanilla No S.
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eschano



Joined: 18 Jul 2012
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 29, 2018 9:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Great tips here, thank you so much!
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