Podcast 34: S-days gone wild (finally!)

Post by **reinhard** » Mon May 12, 2008 2:50 pm

Sorry this took so long!

http://everydaysystems.com/podcast/episode.php?id=34

I'll refrain from making any predictions about when the next episode will be ready since that seems to have an inverse correlation with how long it actually takes...

Reinhard

NoelFigart · Post by **NoelFigart** » Mon May 12, 2008 3:52 pm

Ya know, this one was really worth the wait!

One of the most powerful things the no s diet does is it makes excess seem excessive.

This really jumped out at me. I had a somewhat excessive S day yesterday and compared it to the mindless grazing that I've done in the past and realized I'd had plenty of days that were a lot worse than yesterday!

But you're quite right that not being thrilled about excess (if you can chuck the self-denigration) is an excellent thing.

BrightAngel · Post by **BrightAngel** » Mon May 12, 2008 4:36 pm

Reinhard,
Thanks for the podcast clarifying your position on "S" days.
I found it very encouraging.

OrganicGal · Post by **OrganicGal** » Mon May 12, 2008 4:41 pm

"I think these three little positive attitude adjustments -- proactive reward, no sneaking, and using the structure of 3 meals as your basic starting point -- should be enough to turn most people with actual S-day problems around." (sorry I don't know how to do the quote in a box thingy)

The above quote is what I liked best about your pod cast Reinhard. That is how I'm treating my S days & it's working for me. I'm eating less, getting more pleasure from and ingraining the N day habit even more.

whitway · Post by **whitway** » Tue May 13, 2008 2:49 am

Since I just discovered your diet this morning and followed it with my DW today your timing is impeccable with the latest podcast. We are looking forward to the "No S Diet". Funny thing is I can't remember how I discovered it. I typed something into GOOGLE and a blog came up where someone mentioned it and the rest is history. Looking forward to learning more and giving and getting support on the Discussion Board.

kccc · Post by **kccc** » Tue May 13, 2008 4:35 pm

Really nice organization! I like the levels - very sensible structure. You've captured the on-board discussion (and my own personal journey) around S-days) very well, and given it meaningful structure.

Most of it resonates, plus some "food for thought" - I never thought about the implications of sneak eating. However, regular meals and proactive treats REALLY make a difference to me!

I particularly like this:

Reward isn't just about what you eat, it's about how you eat.

Since I've been working on "making S-days rewarding," that's helpful right now.

My one other mod that I toyed with was to allow sweets and second, but NOT snacks, until I cut the permasnacking habit. I ended up allowing them, but "questioning" every one. (Am I hungry? Do I really want this? No? Well, let's do something else then.)

Thanks again.

gratefuldeb67 · Post by **gratefuldeb67** » Tue May 13, 2008 4:50 pm

Looking forward to listening later tonight Rein.. Its too nice out now so I'm getting out for some much needed sun.
Hope you are well and will drop back in when I check it.
Love
Debs x

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Tue May 13, 2008 6:09 pm

Just listened to the podcast and I thought it was REALLY helpful. this would be a repeater just for being reminded about some of the things that are at the heart of No S ...

I really liked the explanation of how No S works subconscious in the long term where other diets work superficially at the consious level... I liked the description of how over time, it is not just our eyes that get sensitive to excess but our bodies as well.

I think the point that some of us come to NO S with such a "crippled" mentality about food that we cannot enjoy S days is well taken. It probably took the ten years I was married to my husband prior to No S to accept that food and eating are actually supposed to be ENJOYABLE

My husband would gently insist and encourage that I enjoy my food and refuse to allow me to destroy any of his pleasure with eating through the years and finally with No S i am really starting to experience it ... my husband is from the IT world too.. what is about these guys?

ANyway, the other thing that Reinhard pointed out is the kind of "make a big deal" about your essses on S days. THis is just one thing that has probably REALLY worked well for me.

On Saturday, sunday mornings, now holidays and special days we get up together me and my husband walk over to the donut shop where we have made friends with the owners, pick out our donuts, walk over to starbucks, they know us there too, get our drinky things , settle down in the comfy chairs and enjoy our weekend, special day treats.

This makes it ENJOYABLE, FUN, SPECIAL, and defintely NOT SNEAKY

the other thing is the whole concept of FREEDOM ... this is a concept (unlike ENJOYMENT) that I have zero concept comprehending! I love freedom and always have and always will ... I HATE RULES ... anyway ... for me since my husband also does two meals a day ... it is easier for me to just slip into that mode with him, it makes the time we spend together on the weekends have more flow and I can without stress eat things that are rich and gooey and FILLING ... spread out over 2 meals rather than 3, I figure as long as I am rigorous with my three plate meals on N days i am good.

So, Reinhard just want to thank you for the podcast. It is great and timely. I think it really helps understand that No S is the way to go, because it works over the long run and gets easier over the long run,

THANK YOU,
(sorry so long)
Blueskighs

flipturn · Post by **flipturn** » Tue May 13, 2008 9:16 pm

Hi, Reinhard -- Although I have been No S-ing and posting here for five weeks, this is the first podcast to which I have listened. Thanks so much for taking the time to do this. I listened as I was making a banana/walnut cake! It was great to put a voice to the person I feel as though I know.

Post by **reinhard** » Thu May 15, 2008 2:23 pm

I'm glad this resonated with so many of you. Sorry again it took so long! I knew months ago that this was a subject that needed more attention.

Judging from posting volume, another subject that's in equal need of attention is setting realistic expectations (aka, patience). Unfortunately it might take some patience before that one is ready

Reinhard

palomayombe · Post by **palomayombe** » Sat May 17, 2008 3:50 pm

****************

BrightAngel · Post by **BrightAngel** » Sat May 17, 2008 4:20 pm

palomayombe wrote:Reinhard,
I feared... all your new wealth from the book went to your head....

The danger is not in the wealth, but in the fame.

irish · Post by **irish** » Sat May 17, 2008 7:43 pm

Great podcast - it was as if you were speaking directly to me, for I have had trouble with my s days. This is my 6th weekend. My first two were terrible - ate constantly - the next three a little better. This weekend so far has been great. When I felt like having a snack, the key lime pie I had bought for a treat tasted too sweet, so I had a little cottage cheese instead. I couldn't believe that I would ever do such a thing! So you are absolutely right - it does take time to realise that the freedom that you have on s days doesn't mean you have to eat everything in sight. Food will still be there next weekend. Thank you very much - it feels wonderful to give up dieting. The only thing you have to give up on your diet is your diet mentality.

MerryKat · Post by **MerryKat** » Mon May 19, 2008 9:17 am

Reinhard
Thank you for this podcast. The "No Sneaking" jumped off the page for me.

My S days are pretty much N Days with the odd treat inbetween, but reading this I realised just how much the odd handful of things (anything from raisins to smarties) eaten away from my family everytime I went into the kitchen were impacting my S days negatively.

This weekend I made an effort to not Sneak any food and I ate WAY less than usual and as a result enjoyed my meals more and felt better. I still had a few bits of fruit between meals but I ate them around my family not hidden in the corner. I ate nothing out of the sweet cupboard as when I was not sneaking there seemed to be no need.

Post by **reinhard** » Mon May 19, 2008 2:17 pm

The "making a big deal out of S-day esses" and "no sneaking" principles rely on basically the same psychology as the 3 single N-day "spotlight," except they're framed more positively.

I look forward to facing down the temptations of wealth, but I'm afraid I'm still a long ways off.

Reinhard

gingercake · Post by **gingercake** » Mon Jun 09, 2008 1:51 am

I think I should read this every Friday night. This is my second weekend since starting No S and I felt like I went way over the top this time, and am now having those panicky thoughts about cracking down and modifying and telling myself I can't handle freedom and this is never going to work for me etc etc etc.

It's great to read this transcript and realize I'm right on schedule and normal and going through a totally predictable and understandable learning process.

kccc · Post by **kccc** » Sun Jun 15, 2008 2:31 am

Reinhard...

I just wanted to tell you that between my own "memo to self" and your podcast, my S-days have really changed in character.

I'm a slow learner - I think it took about a YEAR for me to come to terms with S-days. (Fortunately, keeping good N-days meant that I didn't gain that year, except during the period when I was "backsliding" on N-days. That in itself was progress, since I had been gaining before.) Still, S-days kept being out of control, with some rather desperate eating followed by feeling ill. I was always kind of RELIEVED when Monday rolled around.

Your comment on a thread that "S-days were supposed to be enjoyable" was extremely helpful. And examples from others (Blueskighs particularly comes to mind on this one) really helped as well. Approaching S-days from the mindset of making them enjoyable, per your podcast, was just the strategy I needed.

At any rate... I am on a much more even keel with S-days. I eat regular meals, and plan genuine treats. This weekend we had root-beer floats, which have been planned since Wednesday, when my 7-year-old discovered root beer at a birthday party and my husband and I remembered having them when we were kids. (We made "gourmet" ones, with high-end vanilla ice cream and micro-brewery root beer. Yum!) Planning ahead - and waiting for the treat - actually seemed to make it more "special."

This is a good place to be, and I am grateful.

I don't make a spectacular weight-loss story, because my weight isn't much different. However, I've lost a lot of mental "baggage" that I'm truly happy to see go. The side effects of maintaining weight through a deprivation mindset are not good. No-S allows me to enjoy food MORE while eating less... what a gift!

Thank you.

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Mon Jun 16, 2008 12:39 am

At any rate... I am on a much more even keel with S-days. I eat regular meals, and plan genuine treats. This weekend we had root-beer floats, which have been planned since Wednesday, when my 7-year-old discovered root beer at a birthday party and my husband and I remembered having them when we were kids. (We made "gourmet" ones, with high-end vanilla ice cream and micro-brewery root beer. Yum!) Planning ahead - and waiting for the treat - actually seemed to make it more "special."

KCCC,

that sounds so WONDERFUL!!!!! it sounds like you are doing really well. I really appreciate people like you who "hang around" for the long term!!!!!!!

So many of your posts are full of inspiration, wisdom and experience that is valuable for all of us.

I don't make a spectacular weight-loss story, because my weight isn't much different. However, I've lost a lot of mental "baggage" that I'm truly happy to see go. The side effects of maintaining weight through a deprivation mindset are not good.

also, I think I may tatoo this quote from Reinhard's book to my forehead

Maintenance is more important than progress

I can easily go through the "trauma" of going through a restricting "dieting phase" and out of control binging phase and then hopless who cares phase in less than a year, with all of the attendant disorientation, mood swings and "insanity, spreading out to all the other areas of my life.

Your inspiring post reminds us that maintenance and getting rid of that mental baggage and making REAL changes in our relationship with food and eating is what is really important.

Thank you for taking the time to share,

Blueskighs

Post by **reinhard** » Mon Jun 16, 2008 1:51 pm

KCCC,

I'm very happy to hear this episode had something significant to say even to a long-time no-esser like you. Your S-days sound pretty wonderful now!

Reinhard

gratefuldeb67 · Post by **gratefuldeb67** » Fri Jun 27, 2008 6:05 pm

Sounds great Rein!
I enjoyed hearing you

I'm gonna restart habitcal today.
Thanks for the continued support and inspiration!
Love

Deb

Post by **reinhard** » Mon Jun 30, 2008 1:49 pm

My pleasure, Deb. It's good to know you're still listening.

I guess it's about time to start thinking about banging out the next one...

Reinhard

harper · Post by **harper** » Mon Oct 06, 2008 1:40 pm

thank you for the latest SO timely for me ..."a newbie" it was my first Sday that I thought i was a bit nutsy....turns out it was just fine and it was my old ....ook way of no no thinking
two months and 14 pounds off and feeling SO TERRIFIC
CHEERS,Gail

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Mon Oct 06, 2008 3:35 pm

Gail,

that is so great!!!!!!!!!

Blueskighs

Post by **reinhard** » Mon Oct 06, 2008 4:27 pm

Harper,

You are very welcome! I'm so happy no-s in general is working for you and that this episode in particular made a difference. If I ever do another edition of the book (sales are "steady" -- it could happen!), I'll make sure to squeeze in the ideas from this segment in somehow.

Reinhard

harper · Post by **harper** » Fri Oct 10, 2008 2:32 pm

...just wanted to add that often I find JUST what I needed to.... while paging through the book...
this,... and the podcasts are SO helpful
being a working artist ....keeping track on paper with the recommended traffic light colors works for me
CHEERS, Gail

oolala53 · Post by **oolala53** » Sun Nov 23, 2008 9:18 pm

I'm probably jumping the gun here but I'm wondering how many wild S days a body should go through before tacking on a restriction or two. I've only had three weekends on plan so perhaps I shouldn't be worrying about permasnacking on chocolate pretty much all day one day a weekend. Of course, I've done this many Saturdays or Sundays in my life, but only about six of them were done without a general sense of "surely, this is wrong." I'm also trying to resist the urge for this to be about wearing something knockout at Christmas or New Year's. (Had to give up on Thanksgiving, but I'll be okay, just not phat.) But back to the issue; just how bad can S days get and have it be true that I'm on the road to reasonably permanent blissful moderation?

NoelFigart · Post by **NoelFigart** » Sun Nov 23, 2008 9:32 pm

I don't know what official canon would say but I don't think three weekends is nearly enough to have gradually merged into better habits. If your N-days aren't all green during that time, leave it alone and don't sweat it yet.

kccc · Post by **kccc** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 12:38 am

oolala, it took me about a YEAR to get S-days to be reasonable. And sometimes they still aren't.

Focus on the N-days. Honest.

If you do want to work on S-days, start with positive choices, not restrictions. (For example, eat three real meals as a base, drink enough, PLAN a special treat proactively... those are some that help me.)

But don't sweat it too much. Really.

harper · Post by **harper** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 1:41 am

I plateaued this month although I have been on track

but a few days ago I had some work done on my studio and had to move STUFF out of the way......my weight budged a bit......therefore it is time for me to REALLY do some workin' out.....DUH

still have 17 off tho.......and feel great!!!

LOVIN NO S

CHEERS,

blueskighs · Post by **blueskighs** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 2:38 am

just how bad can S days get and have it be true that I'm on the road to reasonably permanent blissful moderation?

my experience is the S days get better when you keep the N days green, that being said, I am just finishing my eighth month and it was not really until the fifth month that they started changing significantly and only past two to three weeks have been really settled. I also have absolutely no expectation that they will remained settled forever. I suspect there will always be ones where I eat more than others. But truthfully, for me the longer I developed habit on N days the less reason or desire I have had to have wild S days.

But I am also one who has somewhat purposefully not tried to add any restrictions to my S days. I think you have to a certain degree common sense it ... I use enjoyment as my threshold. After N days stuffing myself on sweets just really becomes not enjoyable at all anymore over time,

Blueskighs

harper · Post by **harper** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 1:16 pm

totally agree with you

Post by **reinhard** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 4:56 pm

oolala53,

I think extra restrictions on S-days are really, really dangerous and almost never worth the risk.

I'd only consider it IF

1) you have a few months of habit under your belt
2) your N-day compliance is close to perfect
3) there actually is a measurable problem
4) you've tried adding moderate regular exercise and that hasn't helped either.

Adding "positive" rules, as KCCC recommends, is a much safer first step -- and may be all you ever need.

Reinhard

oolala53 · Post by **oolala53** » Tue Nov 25, 2008 1:06 am

Thanks, all. Sounds good to me. I'm not even going to think about it again until after the new year or later. Maybe I'll make it a vernal equinox review. Just concentrate on 3 squares a day, 5 days a week. And move more--I can do that.

RAWCOOKIE · Post by **RAWCOOKIE** » Sun Feb 14, 2016 12:09 pm

I am about 8 months in now. My month usually has 0-3 red days and N days are going well. I have listened to this podcast several times - it really helps me not to panic about having a 'bad' S day.

My experience now is that eating snacks and sweets on an S day, instead of meals, doesn't make me FEEL good - and I know that not having the appetite for my meals is not a good thing. My appetite has really diminished overall, so I can no longer eat meals AND snacks!

So the thing I have now is that I WANT to eat the snacks/sweets - but I don't have room for them unless I give up my meals!

I also agree with what Reinhard says about the distortion of the perceived calorie intake on a 'bad' S day. I have a notebook in which I plan my meals, and I jot down what I ate on an S day (I don't count the calories, I just write down 'chocolate' or 'chips' etc. and I can see that it's not nearly as much as I THINK it is.

I've got a personal goal of sticking with the No S with no mods for at least a year. My weight has gone down and is not going up, so I'm on the right track.

I really appreciate these podcasts as reinforcement - thank you!

Elizabeth50 · Post by **Elizabeth50** » Sun Feb 14, 2016 3:50 pm

Rawcookie, Thank you for posting here or I probably wouldn't have seen the podcast. I'm looking forward to listening in tomorrow when I have some alone time.

RAWCOOKIE · Post by **RAWCOOKIE** » Sun Feb 14, 2016 8:32 pm

You're welcome!

Everyday Systems

Podcast 34: S-days gone wild (finally!)

Podcast 34: S-days gone wild (finally!)

Great Timing!

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the book

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