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Linda's daily check-in
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Wed Oct 31, 2018 6:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks auto and Soprano.

Soprano: what you said makes a lot of sense. I’ve gotten through everything this far. I’ll make it through the next thing too.

I was actually doing a lot better till I found out that our rental property has some water damage. I could just feel my cortisol shoot up. I don’t know how much it’s gling to cost but I guess worst case scenario, we have to get the home insurance involved and we pay the deductible. It’ll be okay, or not, but I’ll survive it, right?

I did realize that talking less and listening more works well with teens. For starters there’s less for them to annoyed about. I just need to be a good role model and hope they follow suit. I should have started that 15 years ago but oh well. Better late than never.

Also Halloween is always so stressful around here. It never fails that we are running around the night before Halloween frantically searching for some costume item. Ugh, tonight was no different. 8:30 pm at the mall, searching for a green dress. Yup. We didn’t even get around to carving pumpkins this year. Oh well.

Okay, I’m sure tomorrow will be better.

22/2

Lunch: sushi roll, seaweed salad, large sf chai tea

Exercise: 45 min rowing & weights combo
_________________
"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2018 5:04 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Today was a little better but then I opened my mail and found out I ha e to attend traffic school. I don’t know why this kind of thing stresses me out so badly. I look at the paper and the first thing I think of is that I’m in some kind of deep trouble but this is normal everyday stuff that we all deal with from time to time right? I don’t know why it throws me into a full panic.

Then I thought about it and realized in many parts of my life I’m a badass warrior type but when it comes to legal or financial stuff I just turn into a little puddle. I need to bring that same fighting spirit into the rest of my life and just be like “Bring it on!”
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"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









Instagram "lpearlmom"
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Soprano



Joined: 08 Mar 2018
Posts: 356
Location: UK

PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2018 5:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Love the badass warrior analogy but life doesn't have to be a battle in all areas Smile

Sometimes a relaxed determined calm can achieve as much with less stress hormones

Jx
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eschano



Joined: 18 Jul 2012
Posts: 2591

PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2018 9:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Traffic school - ouch! I remember having to do it and they didn’t allow me to bring my breastfed baby to it so she had to starve it out as she wouldn’t take the bottle - most stressful day that year but we all made it through and I actually learned a few things at this involuntary refresher.
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automatedeating



Joined: 31 Aug 2013
Posts: 2677

PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2018 2:25 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, I'm no help here - going to traffic school would piss me off!

And ugh - the rental. You have a full-time job managing the finances for your family!
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Fri Nov 02, 2018 5:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

That’s true Soprano. I think I just meant I’m stronger than I realize sometimes.

Eschano : that’s awful! I’m so sorry you had to go through that.

Auto: thanks for understanding! It is a lot! I wish I could just be pissed off. But when I open a letter like that I just go into full blown panic and it’s hard for me to just figure out what needs to be done. I had images of huge fines and/or jail time running through my head.

I’ve always had trouble with understanding paperwork & written directions. It’s caused. me a lot of undue stress in my life. I think it’s my ADD tendencies coming through. Anyway I’ve signed up for a session and am okay now. It’s just one day and yes maybe I’ll learn a thing or two.

I finally had a good day! No fights, no unexpected surprises and I got all our bills done with a nice little cushion leftover even. *phew* I’m also taking an herbal supplement that’s supposed to help with anxiety. It seems to be helping my mood.

Another thing I’ve been doing is binge listening this podcast Food Pysch: https://christyharrison.com/foodpsych/

I really find it interesting but I have to be careful. I can’t go down that road of intuitive eating and body acceptance again. I tried that route and ended up miserable. It does make me want to examine Intermittent Fasting though in this context. I’m sure she would say it was a type of disordered eating and I can see how it could look like that from the outside. But the experience is actually the opposite of that notion.

I’ve never obsessed less about food and I’m actually able to eat intuitively within my window quite well now that I’ve decided not to restrict at all. Food seems to have lost its magic which is good and bad. I couldn’t even get excited about Halloween candy last night. But there’s definitely a lot of restricting going on literally approx 20-22 hrs most days. Yet, strangely, it doesn’t feel restrictive.

I do still struggle with my body image though and I desperately want to be 10-20 lbs thinner. Not a lot of acceptance going on there so I probably need to work on that. I’m suddenly looking at all my fasting Facebook groups a bit differently though. Why are we all spending so much time trying to get smaller? Myself included and no I’m not ready to give up that goal but maybe I don’t need to be spending so much time in these groups. There’s got to be other more interesting things I could be doing. In fact after November 6th, I think I’ll take a nice long break from it fb all together.

Anyway these are my current pondering as well as trying to come up with a sustainable exercise plan.

19/2
(I stopped weighing)

Dinner: 2 veg tacos, chips and guacamole, coconut cocktail
Dessert: yogurt, fruit, granola, tea latte, 1 lollipop
_________________
"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









Instagram "lpearlmom"
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Soprano



Joined: 08 Mar 2018
Posts: 356
Location: UK

PostPosted: Fri Nov 02, 2018 5:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just wrote you a long reply and lost it, so frustrating!

I'll try get back later

Jx
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automatedeating



Joined: 31 Aug 2013
Posts: 2677

PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2018 5:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Linda -

I saw your post on someone else's thread about not losing any weight for the past 6 months. I'm sorry for the frustrations you are having with losing more weight. I wish I could fix it for you; I love to have solutions and advice, but in your case, I just feel bad along with you. Sad I feel empathy, so I guess I'm not a sociopath. Laughing

On the bright side, I'm thrilled you had a good day getting stuff done and having peace in the family.

And if you completely removed the idea of weight loss, it appears you are content and happy with the habits of IF, so that has got to count for something pretty cool food-relationship wise.
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Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18 - 23.8
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Soprano



Joined: 08 Mar 2018
Posts: 356
Location: UK

PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2018 10:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I saw your post on my thread too Linda. Big hugs. I'm trying to understand how I might feel in your shoes. At the moment I'm just so pleased to have lost 13lbs which puts me in a range I've spent most of my adult life, however I am at the top of my BMI group and could easily lose a stone or more before getting close to underweight.

You've done really well with your losses so far. From what I now of IF which isn't as much as you, you should be able to continue losing. I know this might sound counter intuitive but are you eating enough in your eating window?

Why not try two meals in a slightly longer window? Maybe after so long you need to shake it up a little, shock your body a bit?

The main thing is you continue with a way of eating that fits your life and health ambitions and don't have any kind of rebound. I'm sure you have a handle on that though Smile

Keep your chin up girl, you are strong and have come so far.

Jx
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 5:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks you guys! I know I’ve talked about this in the past but I decided today to just call it quits on the weight loss front. Ive been listening to a lot of body positivity podcasts and realize how crazy it is that we all feel the need to get ultra thin. Of course so many people make money off our constant dissatisfaction with our body so it makes sense. Some people even see it as a way to keep us oppressed but that’s for another time.

Anyway, I would like to lose more weight but I want to stop this constant battle even more so. My original goal was to lose 50 lbs and I’ve achieved that plus 5 lbs so I think I just want to enjoy that success for a bit and learn to like my body where it’s at. Maybe in 6-12 months I’ll be ready to tackle the last 10-20 lbs but, either way, a break will do me good.

I actually went into my Happy Scale app and put my current weight as my goal weight and viola I’m done. I’m going to work on maintenance now and see what’s going to work best for that. Probably I’ll keep doing what I’m doing but without the pressure of needing to lose weight. That’ll be nice.

Anyway I did look at pics from last May and even though I haven’t lost weight, I look thinner so maybe inches are still coming off or maybe I’ve replaced some muscle with fat. Who knows but I do feel good about my decision. I never ever thought I’d make it even this far. Not everyone needs to be a size 4 and I’m really not sure how much happier losing more weight would actually make me.

16/8.5
154.2 lbs

Break: bagel w avocado, hummus and tomatoes, 1 pancake
Snack: large iced sf chai
Dinner: chicken fajita salad, chips and salsa, part of daughter’s burrito, 2 skinny margaritas
_________________
"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









Instagram "lpearlmom"
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Soprano



Joined: 08 Mar 2018
Posts: 356
Location: UK

PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 5:49 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Great to hear you sound so positive, enjoy where you are and being ultra thin doesn't equal happiness Smile

Jx
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eschano



Joined: 18 Jul 2012
Posts: 2591

PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 8:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

What an inspiring post! Also, I believe weight loss should be measured in inches not weight?
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automatedeating



Joined: 31 Aug 2013
Posts: 2677

PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 3:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Linda - your post epitomized your signature line -- you are the heroine of your own story! I love it!
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Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18 - 23.8
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TexArk



Joined: 27 Dec 2008
Posts: 766
Location: Foothills of the Ozarks

PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 5:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I am with you 100% and at the same place.

I believe maintaining at any weight is victory. The next few months are when I usually gain. I am happy for now and suppress that little niggle saying "5 more lbs" and I am ignoring bmi and just looking at myself in a positive light.

Maintaining needs to become natural for me. It is not as exciting as watching the scale number go down but it should be! Also I don't think more weight loss can occur until our body gets stable at our new low weight.

I do weigh every day though so that I don't fool myself!
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Larkspur



Joined: 06 Mar 2017
Posts: 402
Location: Pennsylvania

PostPosted: Tue Nov 06, 2018 1:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Good for you. I think you are wise to enjoy life and let your body adjust to the amazing change. You've done so well, have found a way of eating that you enjoy and is sustainable, and you don't have to meet some narrow (literally) imposed standard.
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ladybird30



Joined: 07 May 2017
Posts: 397

PostPosted: Tue Nov 06, 2018 3:54 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well done on the 55 lbs, and here's to maintenance.
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2018 5:54 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just wanted to say thanks for all the awesome support! Auto: you made me tear up a bit.

Been so busy with my activist stuff and now tomorrow I have to host a protest with 5k ppl signed. Yup that’s what this introvert has got herself into. ☺️

Anyway on a funny not, I had a whoosh yesterday. My body has quite the sense of humor I guess. I’m still staying on the maintenance train but thought tha was interesting.

Been reading everyone’s thread but unable to respond. Maybe Friday I can finally relax a bit.

Thanks again. We have the best group of ppl here but you all knew that already. ☺️

151.8 lbs

Snack: grapes, latte
Dinner: chicken salad, chips and guacamole, glass wine

exercise : 25 min walk w dogs, circuits—push ups, squats, sit ups
_________________
"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









Instagram "lpearlmom"
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Soprano



Joined: 08 Mar 2018
Posts: 356
Location: UK

PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2018 7:15 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Weightloss is a funny old journey Smile

Great news though

Jx
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alene1



Joined: 07 Sep 2009
Posts: 30
Location: Washington state

PostPosted: Fri Nov 09, 2018 2:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Linda,

I'm really enjoying your journal. I'm experimenting with IF too. I'm doing 16:8 but often have a shorter window. I like the flexibility though. Congrats on your whoosh! I love the way that you feel about food and eating now. That's my goal!
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1559
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Fri Nov 09, 2018 8:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Please give us updates even as you go on maintenance! Thanks,
Kathleen
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Mon Nov 12, 2018 4:21 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Isn’t it Soprano? Of course I’ve been eating a ton and my weights back up a bit but I’ll give myself a little wiggle room.

Hi Alene, my best friend growing up was named Alene too. Don’t see that too often. Yeah I’ve had some good success with IF. I had a shorter window for a long time but having some longer windows now that I’m just trying to maintain. I have some good days and bad days re: food & body image. Today was kind of tough.

Kathleen: I definitely will!

Wow, I dont even know where to start. The last few days have been crazy. I was so nervous about the protest that I barely ate that day. It ended up turning out even better than I could have hoped. It was really surreal seeing everything come together and knowing that it wouldn’t have happened without me. I definitely felt proud. The next day we went to dinner with our neighbors and I stupidly drank after fasting all day (before our food arrived) and it hit me hard. I keep having to relearn this lesson over and over.

Then we had a wine pairing with our tasting menu and I just really overdid it. I’m super embarrassed because I know I was talking more and more animatedly than usual. The worst part is that the husband is sober and I’m pretty sure he thinks I have a drinking problem. I really need to remember—food before alcohol!

The next day I had to get up early to take sweetpea to her volunteer gig and then volleyball and boy was I hung over. I decided to eat in the morning and glad I did. We went to a party that night and I stuck to water but ate a lot of food. Then today I had to go to traffic school and it scared the crap out of me. I’m really going to do a better job with distracted driving and making sure we take an Uber if we plan to drink.

When I came home we went to dinner and were having fun till my girls starting giving me a hard time about something and a switch just went off and I felt really down. I think everything from the last few days is just catching up with me. So many highs and lows plus I’ve bed eating more than usual and don’t like that feeling. Of course it sparks a fear of gaining all the weight back and that never feels good. My house is also messier than usual and I’m just feeling a bit overwhelmed.

At least I don’t have to get up early. I’m sure I’ll feel better if I can clean up tomorrow, get some exercise and get back on my fasting schedule.

16/8

Lunch: 1/2 protein bowl, sf chai
Dinner: 3 pieces of pizza, salad, glass wine
Dessert: 1/2 small ice cream
_________________
"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









Instagram "lpearlmom"
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alene1



Joined: 07 Sep 2009
Posts: 30
Location: Washington state

PostPosted: Mon Nov 12, 2018 3:05 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Linda, my mom's nurse when she delivered me was Alene, and she decided she wanted me to have it too! Smile I'm sorry the weekend felt a bit off and didn't feel great for you. It sounds like you learned some things that will help you going forward. I bet that after a day on your usual fasting schedule, some exercise, and a little cleaning you will feel much better! Those are the things that affect my mood a lot too. Have a great Monday!
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ladybird30



Joined: 07 May 2017
Posts: 397

PostPosted: Tue Nov 13, 2018 2:45 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yes, you have a lot to be proud of Linda - it's a great feeling.
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Tue Nov 13, 2018 3:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks Alene & ladybird!

I didn’t get a workout in but I did get the house cleaned up and back on the fasting track.

I think I’m getting sick though—blech!

18/5
153.6 lbs

Snack: latte, lots of 🍇
Dinner: bowl of brown rice with grilled tofu
Dessert: plain yogurt w/ fruit, a lollipop
_________________
"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









Instagram "lpearlmom"
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Soprano



Joined: 08 Mar 2018
Posts: 356
Location: UK

PostPosted: Tue Nov 13, 2018 7:11 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hope you feel better soon.

Jx
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Wed Nov 14, 2018 5:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Omygosh I decided to do 16/8 today and I ended up eating just a ridiculous amount of food. Not sure what’s going on. Maybe just some backlash or something but I’m definitely not weighing tomorrow.

I just do not think a longer window works well for me. I felt sluggish and down all day long. I think part of the problem is that I’ve been listening to all these body positivity podcasts which just make me question everything that I’m doing but on the other hand I really don’t want to go back to being so overweight. That just doesn’t serve me well at all.

I’m just feeling a little overwhelmed right now but it’ll pass. I know it’s partly to do with the fact that my sisters coming. I always overeat before she comes to visit. *sigh* She’s ruining my favorite holiday.

I think I’m just going to try to stick with 19/5 for awhile. Realistically that’s the easiest window for me to stick to. Boy, this maintenance thing is harder than I thought.

16/8.5
153.6 lbs
Lunch: 2 muffins, yogurt parfait, several pieces grilled tofu
Snack: couple crackers w/ hummus, several gummy bears, lollipop
Dinner: taco salad, horchata

Exercise: still not feeling great.
_________________
"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









Instagram "lpearlmom"
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Soprano



Joined: 08 Mar 2018
Posts: 356
Location: UK

PostPosted: Wed Nov 14, 2018 7:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just a suggestion but why not consider no sweets during your window except on weekends?

Jx
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jenji



Joined: 26 Sep 2017
Posts: 461
Location: Cambridge

PostPosted: Wed Nov 14, 2018 1:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

lpearlmom wrote:
Thanks you guys! I know I’ve talked about this in the past but I decided today to just call it quits on the weight loss front. Ive been listening to a lot of body positivity podcasts and realize how crazy it is that we all feel the need to get ultra thin. Of course so many people make money off our constant dissatisfaction with our body so it makes sense. Some people even see it as a way to keep us oppressed but that’s for another time.

Anyway, I would like to lose more weight but I want to stop this constant battle even more so. My original goal was to lose 50 lbs and I’ve achieved that plus 5 lbs so I think I just want to enjoy that success for a bit and learn to like my body where it’s at. Maybe in 6-12 months I’ll be ready to tackle the last 10-20 lbs but, either way, a break will do me good.

I actually went into my Happy Scale app and put my current weight as my goal weight and viola I’m done. I’m going to work on maintenance now and see what’s going to work best for that. Probably I’ll keep doing what I’m doing but without the pressure of needing to lose weight. That’ll be nice.

Anyway I did look at pics from last May and even though I haven’t lost weight, I look thinner so maybe inches are still coming off or maybe I’ve replaced some muscle with fat. Who knows but I do feel good about my decision. I never ever thought I’d make it even this far. Not everyone needs to be a size 4 and I’m really not sure how much happier losing more weight would actually make me.

16/8.5
154.2 lbs

Break: bagel w avocado, hummus and tomatoes, 1 pancake
Snack: large iced sf chai
Dinner: chicken fajita salad, chips and salsa, part of daughter’s burrito, 2 skinny margaritas


Maintenance - yay! I agree that we don't all need to be rail-thin. There is a balance. When tempted to compare my body to actresses or models (even Instagram fitness people), I remind myself that that is their JOB. A big part of it, at least. And according to my friends in the business, disordered eating abounds. So I think a pause at your goal weight is great, and you may find that you just like it here.
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I'm a 49-year-old mom and non-profit CEO
I am 5' 7.5"
Began No S at 184#, BMI 28.4 - 9/25/2017
Current weight 168#, BMI 25.9- 11/18/2018
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automatedeating



Joined: 31 Aug 2013
Posts: 2677

PostPosted: Thu Nov 15, 2018 12:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

lpearlmom wrote:
I’m just feeling a little overwhelmed right now but it’ll pass. I know it’s partly to do with the fact that my sisters coming. I always overeat before she comes to visit. *sigh* She’s ruining my favorite holiday.


Twisted Evil This made me laugh!!! I think almost all of us could substitute in someone's name in this sentence. The irony of our family ruining our family holiday. But truth!
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Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18 - 23.8
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Thu Nov 15, 2018 5:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Soprano: I guess I could. Sweets haven’t been a huge issue but not sure why I got away from that part of NoS. I’ll tbink about it.

Jen: yup, and even models don’t look like models in real life.

Auto: yeah I guess I never thought about it like that. Can’t I just have a family holiday without the family part? I called my mom and complained about her so I feel a little better. My poor mom.

Feeling better today. I didn’t weigh myself but I’m sure my weight is up. It’s ok, it’s okay, it’s okay. I’m perfect the way I am. If I get much thinner I’ll just get unwanted male attention anyway. Yuck.

We had a big midterm election celebration. It was a lot of fun and so many ppl showed up. Pretty cool but now I’m analyzing all the things that I should have said differently. Being neurotic is so annoying.

18/6

Snack (130): sf iced chai
Dinner: 2 tacos, chips and guacamole, 2 skinny margaritas
Dessert: shared warm cookie w/ ice cream

Exercise: walked dogs 25 mins, sit ups and squats
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"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
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3squaremeals



Joined: 23 Oct 2016
Posts: 254
Location: Australia

PostPosted: Fri Nov 16, 2018 7:19 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I completely understand about the shorter window being easier. I prefer 22/2 personally and find I am able to be more controlled with my eating.

I follow a few body positive nutritionists on social media and that too makes me question if what I'm doing is right and if I'm eating healthy enough. But what I am doing works for me. I guess we just have to do what works for us. I find if I try to hard to eat clean and healthy and limit my sugar I binge and gain weight, I figure eating moderately and enjoying a small sweet treat each day keeps me from binging and going crazy, so surely that is healthier.
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Fri Nov 16, 2018 11:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thank you squares! I think that’s where I’m st too. It works for me and I really don’t want to go back to how I was before. I can eat pretty intuitively in my window and work on body acceptance at the same time though, right?
Lately my fasting has been really off though but I’m going to get back on track tomorrow.

It’s actually the middle of the night and I can’t sleep because of financial stress. I met with a financial advisor yesterday just to see what they had to say and it was all very depressing. We’re not saving enough and are underinsured according to them. It was pretty bad but I’m trying to remember that they benefit from scaring the crap out of us. I’m sure they get all kinds of fees if I sign up for stuff. None of which was affordable btw.

So I did sign up for a hourly based fee consultation with someone else. They don’t make money off of us signing up for stuff so that’s more trustworthy. Also, they base your retirement needs in how much you make now but I’m assuming we’ll have to downsize and live more simply than we do now. It’s not like we’re going to starve or anything. I told doc we can live in the camper and travel across the states. That doesn’t sound so badly actually. He’s no help and doesn’t really seem to want to deal with it so I’m kind of n my own. Maybe if we just live like we’re poor for the next 10 years we’ll be okay.

Just too many eye-opening events lately with politics, the driving school and now our finances. Can’t I just crawl back into my bubble and pretend everything is okay?

Yesterday I took Rosebud to an interview/orientation at this really cool science highschool she wants to attend. It was a pretty amazing school and would be a great opportunity for her but not sure if she’ll get in or not because were out of the district. They only take a small percentage out of district kids but we will hope for the best. She’s a straight A honor student taking HS math, no behavioral problems (at school), tested Into the gifted program and does volunteer work on the weekends. Sorry for the brief brag there but trying to make myself feel better.

Ended up with a really long window today and pretty sure I’ve refilled my glycogen stores but will work on depleting them over the next couple of weeks.

10am: almond milk vanilla latte
1pm: tofu with brown rice
8pm: ahi tuna salad, edamame , 2 glasses of wine
9pm: ice cream (ugh)

Eating late is such a bad idea as it usually results in relflux ....

Exercise; walked dogs 25 mins, 13 min circuit

I really hope I can dig myself out of my current hopeless state.
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"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









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automatedeating



Joined: 31 Aug 2013
Posts: 2677

PostPosted: Fri Nov 16, 2018 2:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

lpearlmom wrote:


So I did sign up for a hourly based fee consultation with someone else. They don’t make money off of us signing up for stuff so that’s more trustworthy. Also, they base your retirement needs in how much you make now but I’m assuming we’ll have to downsize and live more simply than we do now.

Yesterday I took Rosebud to an interview/orientation at this really cool science highschool she wants to attend. It was a pretty amazing school and would be a great opportunity for her but not sure if she’ll get in or not because were out of the district. They only take a small percentage out of district kids but we will hope for the best. She’s a straight A honor student taking HS math, no behavioral problems (at school), tested Into the gifted program and does volunteer work on the weekends. Sorry for the brief brag there but trying to make myself feel better.

Ended up with a really long window today and pretty sure I’ve refilled my glycogen stores but will work on depleting them over the next couple of weeks.

I really hope I can dig myself out of my current hopeless state.


My dad always has been a fan of the fee consultants. People don't want to pay up front, but if you do, you know they are giving you their best advice rather than trying to sell you something. So my dad would approve. Lol.

Yay for Rosebud! And I laughed at the "no behavior problems (at school)". Smile
I hope she gets in!! So Sweetpea in the Art Charter and Rosebud in the Science Charter! Sounds like lots of fun driving for you! Good thing you've had your safe driving refresher recently. Laughing

And does it really take weeks to get our glycogen stores down? Sheesh, and here I was thinking it only took a day or two of either fasting or low-carb eating.
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Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18 - 23.8
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Sat Nov 17, 2018 3:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think they were using a lot of fear tactics to get me to buy stuff. When I looked up the average amount saved at retirement, the amount we have already saved is 5x that so maybe things aren’t that bad. I’ll try to do what I can to improve things but panicking isn’t going to help anything and is definitely messing with my mental health.

Auto: thanks, I sure hope Rosebud gets into that school too. It’s actually a specialty public school & about 5 mins from sweetpeas school but yeah still a lot of driving as it’s about 30 mins from our house. 😱

When you’re first starting out doing IF or keto it takes a couple weeks to deplete your glycogen stores but if you just go off a day or two it’ll just take a couple days to deplete them again. At least that’s my understanding. My windows have been so long lately that I really don’t feel like I’m in fat burning mode right now.

My weight is okay though despite feeling like my eating has been all over the place. We’ve just been eating out way too much lately and I don’t really enjoy restaurant food as much as eating at home unless it’s a special restaurant. Although I do like being waited on and not having to do dishes.

16/7
153.4 lbs

12:45 pm-almond milk latte
Snack: handful of pretzels and plantain chips
Dinner: crab cakes, salad, spinach dip w/ bread
Dessert: few pieces of chocolate, lollipop

Too tired to exercise today.
_________________
"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









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worth it



Joined: 01 Oct 2013
Posts: 438

PostPosted: Sat Nov 17, 2018 3:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Linda,

Just wanted to pop in and say, YOU GOT THIS, even though it probably doesn’t feel like it right now.

What I have observed over the past several years by connecting with you through this board, is that you always slowly and steadily make progress towards your goal even with minor setbacks here and there. Basically, I have seen your fierce tenacity-once you set your mind to something, you will achieve it- either with weight loss, more self acceptance, and now, with your financial situation.

While it might be difficult not necessarily having your husband’s input to your financial situation, it is probably one of the ways in which you compliment each other so well- I guarantee he admires (and wishes he had) your ability to face reality even when it’s not so great, AND your determination to get through the difficulty over time.

I know you will figure this out too- just give yourself a little time to find the way forward. It sounds to me you are already on your way by engaging the right people (financial advisor), to you help you achieve your goal. By the way, this is a quality of great leaders-and you have it, naturally! 😉

Anyway, just wanted to send a little encouragement your way. I look forward to seeing you achieve this next goal!

p.s. I also know you will find your next best path on IF in no time- just sounded like you needed a little break from the routine for a while (like we ALL do sometimes).
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automatedeating



Joined: 31 Aug 2013
Posts: 2677

PostPosted: Sat Nov 17, 2018 4:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

worth it wrote:

you always slowly and steadily make progress towards your goal even with minor setbacks here and there. Basically, I have seen your fierce tenacity-once you set your mind to something, you will achieve it- either with weight loss, more self acceptance, and now, with your financial situation.



Perfectly said, Worth! You got this Linda, yes!
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Month/Year-BMI
8/13-26.3; 8/14-24.5; 5/15-26.2; 1/16-26.9; 9/16-25.6; 8/17-25.8; 11/17-26.9; 3/18-25.6; 8/18-24.5; 10/18 - 23.8
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1559
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sat Nov 17, 2018 8:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Standard financial advisor fee is 2% of assets under management. If you give them $1,000,000 to manage, they take $20,000 off the top every year. They have to make $20,000 on that $1,000,000 every year before you get anything. Just be careful. We ended up throwing all our retirement income into the Vanguard S&P 500. Sure it tanked in 2008, but it has recovered nicely since then, and we didn't take out any money in 2008. I did meet with several financial advisors before deciding that we needed to manage our money, not rely on someone else. Frankly, we couldn't afford the fees! We still have 13 more semesters of college left!
Kathleen
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Sun Nov 18, 2018 6:40 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks for the vote of conflidence ladies! I’m sure I’ll figure it out. I’m actually a little pissed off that they preyed on my fears actually. I thought I was just meeting the wife for coffee so she could let me know what they did but then she showed up with her husband and they blindsided me. I also know they’re both just starting out so I’m sure they’re desperate to land some new clients. They probably saw doctor & the big house and thought big money.

Kathleen: that’s a crazy lot of money for sure. I’m hoping going with an hourly rate will make more sense. Or else I’ll just figure it out on my own.

Omg, I ate a lot today. I think it’s triggered by the fact that my sister is coming. She’s so obsessed with being thin and has always tried her best to make me thinner too. Just thinking about her coming makes me want to eat. It’s either out of stress or rebellion or anticipation of deprivation. I’m trying to remind myself that my body is none of her business.

I’m not even going to write everything I ate today and defnot weighing myself tomorrow. Tomorrow doc & I are going to a football game. I’m excited to spend the day together.
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"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









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Larkspur



Joined: 06 Mar 2017
Posts: 402
Location: Pennsylvania

PostPosted: Sun Nov 18, 2018 3:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm sort of steamed for you about the high pressure sales tactics.

I have more your role with the money, my husband makes most of our income and I do more of the thinking about it. Which means there are bursts of activity and then long stretches of benign neglect, LOL. When you read money blogs, there's a lot of "We have a combined 1.4 million in our 401ks and we're 32 years old" kind of people. I think when you make a lot, the expectation is you will have the standard 6x salary or whatever by this age. But when you're a physician, you spent a huge chunk of those early years in school not making much or anything, plus you may have had sizable loans to pay back, so it isn't exactly comparable to say an MBA.

I liked Elizabeth Warren's book, All Your Worth, and the Dave Ramsey stuff can be motivating if you have debt to deal with. I really believe if you get the basics in place (saving in a low-cost index fund, paying down debt) the rest of it is just refinements. I also recommend How to Pay For College Without Going Broke. Anyway you're clever and determined and your husband is an extremely capable provider, so I don't doubt you're going to do great.

I hope your sister's visit is nicer than you expect! Would she be open to the idea of tabling diet talk? It is verboten in our house when my middle daughter is home, and that's a good thing.

Have a great run up to Thanksgiving Smile
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Sun Nov 18, 2018 3:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ohh thanks for understanding larkspur! It’s all such a pain but I think you’re right, if I can get some basics in place, I’ll be alright. I appreciate the book recommendations too. I can’t deal with Ramsey for some reason but the rest look great.

Funnily, she doesn’t really engage in diet talk much anymore but it’s just her general vibe combined with all, those memories of her trying to get me to diet and exercise more. She’s only coming for about 36 hrs but is asking to go hiking AND to the gym plus her size zeroness just makes me feel self-conscious. Also, she’s never said anything about my weight loss. Maybe she’s just not wanting to make a thing about weight loss in general but my hunch is she doesn’t want to compliment me till I’m as skinny as she thinks I should be. I hope I’m just being paranoid.

Anyway off to the football game!
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"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









Instagram "lpearlmom"
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1559
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Sun Nov 18, 2018 7:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

lpearlmom,
If the person you are paying an hourly fee is from a national organization, could you let us know the name of it or message it to me? I looked all over for someone who would give us financial advice at an hourly rate. All I found were people who wanted to manage our assets. Thanks!
Kathleen
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
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Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Mon Nov 19, 2018 5:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Kathleen! Here’s the website that I found through another article. It was recommended for people with an average amount of money. https://www.garrettplanningnetwork.com/

They’re calling me tomorrow to do a consultation so I can let you know how it goes.


I overdid it again today. A lot of junky food at the football game. But I did just realize my period is due tomorrow so that could be part of the overeating. One think I noticed though is that when I’m being consistent with fasting I almost never experience that oout of control feeling with food that I dislike so much. I’m definitely ready to get back into the swing of things.

We did have fun but baseball is really more of my scene. It’s just so “extra” as my kids would say.

This week is going to be crazy. We have about 12 people coming plus I think our neighbors are stopping by for dessert. I’m going to have to hit the ground running tomorrow to make sure everything gets done on time.

Lunch (1pm): hot dog, popcorn, Candied nuts, 2 margaritas
Dinner: hummus w/ pita bread , a couple chips w/ guacamole, eggnog
_________________
"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









Instagram "lpearlmom"
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3squaremeals



Joined: 23 Oct 2016
Posts: 254
Location: Australia

PostPosted: Mon Nov 19, 2018 9:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I now really dislike that out of control feeling around food too. My last 2 days have been shocking, been emotional eating due to fighting with hubby although we have talked things through tonight. I can't wait to get back to fasting tomorrow though, I actually miss it when I have a bad day.
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lpearlmom



Joined: 02 Aug 2013
Posts: 3843
Location: Arizona

PostPosted: Mon Nov 19, 2018 4:22 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yeah, square it’s kind of like NoS where you really lol forward to getting back to it.

Kathleen, they called this morning and she said we were in a “good” place so that made me feel much better. Unfortunately they don’t have people in AZ but she’s going to find me someone. Here’s another website: https://www.napfa.org/ for fee only consultations. It’s about $500 per session and she said I’d need about 4 sessions. Not cheap but cheaper than the other route by a long shot.
_________________
"Above all, be the heroine of your life and not the victim.” Nora Ephron

3/14-210 lbs;
3/15- 202 lbs;
1/16- 172 lbs;
9/17-177 lbs;
1/18-162 lbs;
9/18-154 lbs;









Instagram "lpearlmom"
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Kathleen



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 1559
Location: Minnesota

PostPosted: Mon Nov 19, 2018 7:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks for the info, lpearlmom. I'll have to look into it!
Kathleen
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